Chasing After Me

I’m so sick of watching and reading news lately. I’m tired of hearing about the debt ceiling.  I’m tired of hearing about credit downgrades. I’m tired of negative economic news sending people into a panic.

Is that what life is really all about?

Oh, I’m not naïve. I get it. I understand the implications. I freelance and consult to make ends meet. My husband works for a major U.S. retailer. I know what happens when companies tighten expenses their customers tighten expenses. I get it. I could dwell on it…scurry…worry…but it’s not worth it to me.

It’s not what life is about.

Today 31 Navy Seals died in a helicopter crash in Afghanistan. It’s not about why our military is there and whether or not it’s the right thing. It’s not what this blog is about.  The point is 31 families are hurting today. Their hearts are breaking. They’re hanging on to memories. They’re shedding tears. They’re probably immensely proud of their lost ones. They probably wish they could have shared their feelings with their loved ones just once more.

Those families are being thrust into remembering what life is really about.

I’m pretty sure that today those families don’t care about the downgraded U.S. credit score. Frankly, I’m pretty sure that many of them would probably give up their jobs for another moment with their lost loved ones. I bet that the lives of those 31 Navy Seals have collectively inspired tens of thousands of others…inspired them to really live…really embrace life…

And the odd and encouraging thing is that despite the hurt that comes with this news is that even in death, the inspiration of those 31 Seals lives…lives filled with life, passion, commitment and loyalty…lives filled with life.

The economy will fluctuate forever. But life isn’t about money. Life isn’t about worrying what may or may not happen. Life is about embracing LIFE. Life is about inspiring others to LIVE. Life is about a community’s love and compassion for one another amid hurts and shortfalls. That’s the life I want to live…not wasted on worry…but a life embracing hope…an economy of life.

I love writing. I love being vulnerable. I believe deeply that every thought and experience one person has can change at least one other life for the better.

So why is writing this blog (and the five book ideas in my head!) hard for me? Maybe it’s because I know that I know that I know that it’s something I should be doing and I put ridiculous pressure on myself.  Maybe it’s because I think doing other things with my time are more fruitful. Maybe it’s because it’s because it requires me to publish unrefined thoughts. Maybe it’s because a part of me is afraid of the vastness of where things could lead. I don’t know. It’s probably all of that.

But, I’m surrounded by amazing human beings. Amazing human beings who don’t know that they even hold me accountable to doing what I love…hold me accountable to not discounting what I love…hold me accountable for something they know I’m supposed to be doing, too. I’m grateful for them. They keep me going.

I think we all inexplicably avoid things we’re passionate about. And I think it’s because of fear. It’s stupid becaus, if it’s a passion of ours, and it’s a competency of ours, then it is our strength….and I believe that God operates through the unique talents he’s given each of us…operates through us. Why wouldn’t we give our strengths to Him, too? What’s to be afraid of? Because, perfect love casts out fear.

Close your eyes. Take a deep breath. Take a few more. Remember how much you’re loved. Trust that love. Trust the peace. And let God take over…no fear…we’re not alone.

Knowledge informs. Being informed is a good thing. Knowledge serves a purpose.

While knowledge and information help us get through life, experiences stoke passions in our lives…experiences transform our perspectives…experiences evoke cravings for the possible.

Knowledge is controllable. Experiences can be scary…we subject ourselves to the unknown. Allowing ourselves to experience life opens us up to risk. But experiences in our lives will always be more profound and fulfilling than any knowledge could possibly be.

Ask me how I know. Experiences changed me.

I had a conversation with a friend the other night. He shared a story of string of experiences that brought the knowledge he had to life. It ignited passion in him. It ignited excitement. It ignited a desire for more. He let the experiences take hold of him and bring him somewhere filled with life. Knowledge couldn’t do that on it’s own.

We get to embrace experiences. We get to create opportunities for others to experience. We get to let experiences transform us.

We get to grow. We get to learn. We get to share.

We get fulfilled.

Empty buckets.

We all deal with them from time-to-time. It doesn’t mean we’re sad or depressed or unhappy. It just means we’re not putting any fuel in our tanks.

For some, fuel is solitude.

For some, fuel is accomplishments.

For some, fuel is adventure.

For some, fuel is exercise.

For some, fuel is people.

It’s important to know what your fuel is. I only know because it took me 35 years to figure out that my tank runs on people.

What happens when you don’t know what your fuel is? You might get depressed. You might get crabby. You likely won’t feel fulfilled.

And, everyone has a different kind of fuel.

The thoughts are front and center for me this week because I was a task machine…got a ton of work done. But, I decided to work from home. And neither my husband, nor roommates were home. For me, one day of solitude is good. Two days gets exhausting. Three days makes me restless. Four days makes me crabby. Five days makes me hypersensitive. And, pretty soon, I find myself in a spiral of not wanting to be around anyone, yet knowing that people are my fuel.

My guess is that the cycle is similar for anyone who doesn’t know what their fuel is…or doesn’t take steps to fill it.

Remember, we all need fuel…and fuel isn’t a crutch. Your fuel is probably tied to the strengths of who you are as a human being.

Sponges will come along and dry up your fuel. And that’s to be expected. But we always want to be sure there’s something in the bucket…otherwise we’ll be left bone dry…with nothing left to give.

Fuel up, my friends.

Two and a half years ago, my life turned upside down. I left the comfort and security of a solid job to pursue things burning inside of me.

Little did I know at the time that those flames would turn into a full-on inferno of passion and an unstoppable drive to further a mission of grace, love and freedom.

That description probably sounds like sunshine and rainbows, but it’s been hard…and I’ve learned a lot.

Prior to that point in my life, I felt like I knew what I was meant to do…since I loved communications and helping people put thoughts into words, I felt as if I existed to help people embrace the purpose, significance and value in their stories…to help them articulate their stories using their strengths…strengths that maybe they didn’t even realize existed…and then cheer them on to whatever the future held.

Then things changed.

I vividly remember having conversations with my closest friends once I took on my role at Bloom. It sometimes felt awkward and clunky. I remembered saying that I was always used to being in the backseat helping people be great…I wasn’t used to being front-and-center. Looking back, it’s obvious why it felt awkward and clunky, I took my focus off of purpose…tried to embrace a different purpose.

THAT was my biggest mistake.

It was frustrating for a while. Things felt very right, yet somehow off. I couldn’t put my finger on it. After a few months, I finally let things go and just let myself act like Dawn again, and then things felt right…but at the time I didn’t really know why.

Then one day it became crystal clear. It was as if God, himself, was talking to me…and, frankly, I don’t doubt that he was.

“Your purpose never changed. I just gave you a new platform.”

That might sound crazy. That might sound anti-climactic. But, to me, it was jarring, freeing and energizing. A reminder that – no matter what life tosses at me, or where I volunteer my time, or where I work, or whomever I speak to – my purpose lies in encouraging others…and helping them embrace their stories to inspire more people. Sure, throughout my life I’ll have to learn my way around new spaces, but each new venue doesn’t change who I was meant to be. It was then when things began clicking again…because I realized that I could embrace that purpose I knew was always there…in my role at Bloom…in my role at work…as a wife…as a friend. Now, I can say I’m more confident, excited, peaceful and ready to take on new challenges…because I know I can be me no matter where I am.

…and my prayer is that everyone finds that place where they can embrace their purpose…not think it needs to change…not think it’s tied to a specific job, role or earthly relationship…because I genuinely believe it’s God-given and much bigger than that…that purpose will help us do our jobs, be better spouses, be better parents, be better friends…simply be.

***If you haven’t ever read Strengths Finder 2.0, do it. Take the assessment. It’s a great tool and can help you embrace your talents…event things you don’t see as talents right now.

***Take a listen to Bloom’s Purpose Realized series…the messages I heard during this time helped me hear more clearly from God.